Quick spoiler if you are expecting an over accomplished review with a happy ending, you will be disappointed. There's no job with Google, Microsoft, or anything of that sort. My year in review will focus on more of my challenges and how I overcame them. I am dedicating this review to my friends. Let us begin;
The year begins:
The new year vibe.
Like many others, I was excited at the beginning of the year. I set many goals for myself; I wanted to make my first million bang that great high-paying job. January started on a great note with a gig I had to eventually drop for some personal reasons. During the first six months, I dealt with anxiety and self-doubt. I was referred to for some job openings and freelance gigs, but I didn't take any. I was getting ready to write my exams; I was stuck as an intermediate designer and had a fear of messing up if I got a full-time role.
Self-doubt.
My relationship breakup and the fear of the future crippled me from making a lot of design growth this year. I spent most of my days being sad and unable to come out of that box this year. However, seeing my friend's big wins was a source of joy to me. It took a lot for me to open up about whatever I was feeling at that moment. I couldn't express my feelings through design. I hesitated each time I tried to apply for that job or take that gig. Getting me to talk about my feelings or acknowledge them was almost impossible.
Heartfelt Emotions.
Although my breakup is an amicable one. It's not easy getting over someone. I was sad for weeks, however. With the help of my close friends, I felt better. After dealing with this, I had to deal with my exam results. In general, I felt I was jinxed. Although I didn't carry over any course, I still blamed myself for poor performance, and I became more emotionally unstable because I kept quiet about everything.
Second half of the year:
The calm in the storm.
I dealt with emotional instability, anxiety, self-doubt, and being stuck as an intermediate designer. It felt like I had no way out. Talking about it didn't really make much of a difference. I, however, hit my breakthrough when I came across a UI/UX training. ATG/IHS. It was my central stepping stone for me; it was for beginner designers (So I thought at first). However, I needed to stop feeling the pressure of being an intermediate designer. So I applied and got the scholarship. In a matter of weeks, my UX had been strengthened to another level. I began to think on another level. It was a fantastic feeling, having access to a fantastic product designer for a mentor. I couldn't be the best student I was aiming for because of exams. I learned a lot. I also applied for different student ambassadorship programs like Cowryrise and AngelHack. I got in for both. However, I felt distant from everyone and everything. I was close to being depressed.
Army.
Despite my insecurities, I randomly came across a video of BTS Leader Kim Namjoon(RM) giving a speech. That video changed my life. Click here to view the video. I had never listened to BTS songs before or anything; I just didn't like them because my close friends hyped them too much. Seeing RM talk, hearing him, I thought if someone could talk so passionately about the importance of loving yourself, they are definitely worth the hype. I became an ARMY and made army friends. Being an army taught me how to be more self-expressive. However, I got a bit carried away with BTS and became obsessed at some point. However, when you have people like Precious Omonze in your life, you will feel fine after a few take-it-easy talks. I wrote my exams, and I was able to do a lot better than I expected. I balanced being a BTS army, school, and other activities.
SIWES.
I did my SIWES Training from September -November in a medical laboratory. At this point, my anxiety became much worse and was at its peak. I had to go to work and interact with people. Despite it being for 2 months, it felt like 2 years. My colleagues tried to make me as comfortable as possible. During this period, I made a work mistake that cost the laboratory a fine. I was overwhelmed at that point. I reached out to someone who helped me deal with my emotions.
Mentorship.
I became a GDSC Design lead this year and even gave a small talk to some tutors. I felt like a boss. Organized my first design event, learned about blockchain technology and web3 and accepted a small gig.
Sadly, I lost my grandfather. Seminar and IT defense hit me. However, God and my friends really came through for me. I got to be a design consultant for a transport company called transtura. Last month, I was given a contact role to redesign their mobile application and was contracted to help design some of their upcoming features.
I definitely had a very long emotional year. I didn't accomplish a lot of things. However, I am grateful for where I am now. I made new friends lost some, strengthened my friendships.
What I learned:
“Things might not always go the way we plan, but I am thankful for everyday, every tear, and every opportunity. Every second I am alive.”
“My biggest lesson in 2021, is if you want to do something, just do it.”
“My emotions affected me a lot this year. Surround yourself with positivity and good friends. Ask for help.”
You can access this presentation slide here
What I am thankful for:
God first, I hadn't been so spiritual this year, but I am grateful to God for always connecting me to people who brought me up and lifted my spirits when I was down. Friends, Family, BTS, Army. This review won't be complete without me mentioning Bakare Emmanuel's name, and he is a true inspiration and definition of success.
It's a wrap; thanks for reading; please comment this is hashnode, so I won't say send funds. I didn't mention a lot of names. But I am also thankful to everyone who was a part of my 2021. Thank you. Next year we are moving. It took a lot of courage and encouragement to do this, and I am glad I did.